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Author Topic: Raph and the Spiders of Doom  (Read 3923 times)
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Leonardo
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« on: October 09, 2006, 12:23:50 AM »

Yes, Storm 2 is not finished.
Yes, I haven't really written a TMNT fan fic in ages.
But at last I was inspired by things on Thread Killer to write one. It's going to be a short story, perfect for Halloween.

And so I present the first part as a teaser. When I finish it, I will post it on my fan fic site.
 Very Happy

“AAAAH!”
Raph’s cry emanated from the kitchen and echoed around the lair.
Don stopped typing at his computer for a moment, then continued on.
“That’s the third time this week,” Leo sighed from where he sat on the floor attempting to meditate.
Mike heard it not, adorned with headphones, he was nearing the completion of another level on his video game.
Don counted, “Four. Three. Two. One and-”
“Bugs! I HATE bugs!”
“Please, not the Citrus Febreeze again!” Leo groaned.
“Aaargh! Not behind the Fridge!! Come out where I can see you!”
“Or smell you,” Leo snorted. “Phael Logic! ‘Ones I can smell approaching at great distance.’”
“What else was it Raph said yesterday? Something about an insidious Coalition for Spider Supremacy? And you just had to go and tell him he’s 'a marked Turtle'.”
“You forgot my part about the modern generation of Shelob’s ilk, Gen 1313 out to get him. He was going on and on about how ‘they are getting CLOSER’ and ‘bad horror movie of the Citrus Spiders From Beyond the Freezer.’”
“Raph has gone a bit Mikey on us. I expect he’ll be screaming like him soon,” Don stated in a tone of doom.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAH!”
A sai flew out from the kitchen to clang to the floor next to Leo. Snatching it before it stopped moving, Leo was up to his feet and flying in the opposite direction. “For crying out—DON!”
“Oh Leo, not you, too. It’s just silly little spiders.” Don got up and stomped toward the kitchen. “You’re not much better than Raph when it comes to spi—dAAH!”

--to be continued--

 LOL
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Raphael
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« Reply #1 on: October 09, 2006, 08:04:29 AM »

LOL!!

Oh my...I was afraid it would turn out to be something like this. Happy/Smile

Thankfully, the Coalition for Spidey Supremacy seems to have faded...they've not been seen for two days.

Hopefully, we won't have to wait as long to see what happens next in your story!

"Spi--DAAH!" indeed. Wink
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« Reply #2 on: October 09, 2006, 07:46:32 PM »

Them spiders must have been the ones from that HP movie.

(admits to being just a mite curious now)

Happy/Smile (Anime Style)
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engelina
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« Reply #3 on: October 10, 2006, 01:36:02 AM »

Quote from: "Donatello"
Them spiders must have been the ones from that HP movie.


you mean like this one

and as for the story nice so far, and i am hoping to read more of it soon!! i want to know what happens next!
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Leonardo
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« Reply #4 on: October 10, 2006, 01:50:46 AM »

Well done!!
That's perfect!
 LOL  LOL  LOL

Of course, it also makes me want to run the other way.
Razz

I'll try to get to the story as soon as I can, but I had sword class after work tonight,, so I apologize.
But I'll get it done by the weekend for sure!!
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« Reply #5 on: October 10, 2006, 02:26:39 PM »

Hoo, Leo is writing a fan fic!  

 Party!  Dancing Party!  Dancing Party!  Dancing
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« Reply #6 on: October 13, 2006, 11:45:40 PM »

Haven't visited TMNT-L Forum in a while and what do I find when I do?  

Leonardo is writing a fic.  Can it be?  Is it true?  

Be still my  heart!

And....I loved it!  Short, sweet, fast past, funny as all heck, and leaves me begging....for a fly swatter.

I hate bugs, but most especially spiders.  Seriously, you ain't heard anyone scream until you've heard me!

And, funny thing is, I just fired off a test story to Cynlee today that has a spider in it.  A - rather LARGE spider, actually, so I'm doubly curious as to what Leonardo has in store for us.  

Hmm...guess I'll stay tuned for the next chapter of 'Raph and the Spiders of Doom'.   Spiderman

Be blessed,
Rene'
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« Reply #7 on: October 26, 2006, 10:08:28 PM »

The site that greeted Don was certainly a surprise, and certainly worth a closer inspection. Raph was webbed to the fridge, and two 2’ foot spiders were scuttling into position to spray Raph with a can of Febreeze. Citrus scent to be exact, Raph’s preferred choice. Although admittedly not normally for personal use directly on himself.
Three others were arranged in a semi-circle that had to be a cheering section. Legs from under the fridge were tickling at Raph’s ankle. One was hanging from the top of the freezer, front legs extended down to pat-pat Raph’s head. They’d even webbed Raph’s mouth shut.  
“They are clearly sentient! This is amazing!”
One of the cheering circle had turned to face the newcomers. It raised itself up in a menacing posture.
Leo stared at Don. Blinked once. “Don…” Words failed him. He changed his grip on the sai, turning his attention back to the spiders.
“They must have been mutated,” Don pondered.
“By the Febreeze?!”
“By something….”
“Postulate of the Obvious, Don. But we have to do something.”
Raph was looking rather freaked--no, angry. Well, both things actually. And the can wielding spiders were preparing to enact their revenge.
It was clear from the way Leo was handling the sai, he was intending to put it to use.
“Leo, we shouldn’t just kill them, they’re intelligent. And spiders are good. They eat all sorts of bad pesty bugs.”
“Vampires, they still creep me out,” Leo snorted. “And maybe these are evil?”
“Raph did spray them first….”
Struggling against the bonds, Raph managed to move the fridge forward an inch, but did not free himself.
“That’s some webbing! Amazing stuff, spider webs.”
“Don!! You don’t want to kill them, and I’ll try to respect that, but we’ve got to help Raph and get them out of here. Now!”
“It’s just a can of Febree--”
Just then a powerful wave of citrus scent roiled through the kitchen as the spiders succeeded in blasting Raph.
“—ze!” Don sneezed.
Eyes watering, coughing, Leo threw the sai at the can, sending it spinning across the kitchen. Then he leapt over the spiders to the stove, grabbing a large pot. “Fine, Don. I’ll do this your way.” Facing off to the spider running at him, he slammed the pot down on the floor over the spider. “Hope you like Mikey’s mac and cheese.”
Don yanked open a drawer near at hand, and whipped out the garbage bags. “Leo! Get the broom! Let’s round up these little doggies!”
Over the next several minutes, a strange battle ensued. The spiders were fast and rather aggressive. Things got knocked over or bumped into during the chase. But Leo would finally maneuver the spiders for Don to scoop into the bag, or actually bat the spiders in for Don, who’d quickly tie the bags shut. The spider on the fridge played a hide and seek game behind the chip bag, to which Leo swept the whole thing off into Don’s bag. “Eh, the ketchup chips,” Leo noted. “No loss,” he smirked.
Raph glared balefully at Leo.
Leo dropped to floor level. The spider making its raids from under the fridge didn’t like the broom invading its place. It came flying straight at Leo’s face. Don bagged it just as Leo rolled back with a gasp of horror.
“There! Got them all!”
“We hope….” Leo shuddered.
They both jumped as the fridge made another grating sound. But it was Raph again. His mood was most definitely pizza'ed off.
“Does this look familiar to you somehow?” Don asked.
“Sorry, bro,” Leo said getting a knife to cut Raph free.
“AAAArgh!!! About time! Let me stomp them!!” Raph moved toward the wriggling bags.
Don put a hand on Raph’s plastron. “Please, Raph. Let me take them far away and let them go. They didn’t poison anyone, they just sprayed you back. Repeat after me: Spiders are good.”
“Duuudes…it STINKS! What did you do? WHOA! I am so not getting blamed for this!”
In the doorway, Mikey was waving his hands in a hopeless attempt to dispel the citrus-laden air. The smell had reached him playing his video game and brought him to investigate. His gaze swept over the disarray, clearly puzzled. “What’s the point of filling all those garbage bags with so little, and then all this stuff—like *this* on the floor! My leftovers!!” he cried.
“No, Mikey!” Leo yelled, as Mike picked up the pot.
Mike’s shriek as the cheesy pasta-coated spider jumped onto his foot nearly shattered all the glass.
Raph dove for the spider and grabbed it before it could scurry away. He held it up. “You listen to me, bug! If I promise not to febreeze you, and you and your spider coalition stay far, far away from me, you get to live. Got it? Truce?”
The spider waved its legs in what seemed to be a yes. Then Don bagged it.
“Okay, I’m out of here. I’ll be back in a while,” Don said, grabbing the bags before anyone changed their minds.
“Th-there was was more than one?” Mike asked in a voice with a slight quivering.
“Seven,” Don said on his way out, looking like some weird kind of Santa Claus heading out with presents to deliver.
“Seven…spiders…” A brief span to contemplate it, and Mike regained his normal state of mind. “Sounds like some kind of horror movie, ‘Raph and the Seven Spiders of Doom’! This is Raph’s fault we got invaded.”
“Mikeeey,” Raph growled and moved closer to bap Mike.
“No! Don’t touch me! Peeyuuu! Raph you smell so fr--”
“DON’T SAY IT!”
As Mike moved to avoid Raph, his foot slipped in the mac and cheese. Before he could finish wiping out, Raph had him pinned.
As the wails went up, Leo opted to seek sanity and faded away. “This place is cursed,” he muttered as the ruckus crashed on.  

THE END!
 Raphael  Donatello  Leonardo  Michaelangelo
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reinbeauchaser
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« Reply #8 on: October 26, 2006, 10:33:34 PM »

Hiliarious as before.  Loved it muches!  

But, wow, seven very large spiders?  And smart?  Um...this qualifies for a Halloween fic, ya do know that, right?  

I'm gonna have nightmares now.  Seven eight-legged creatures of my worse dreams, twenty-eight more legs than I prefer to deal with, believe me.

My son saw his first camel spider in Iraq a week or so ago.  He was going down a darkened stairwell with his flashlight up and at 'em, when the batteries died.  About the time everything went dark, and the moonlight managed a bit of natural lighting through one of the small windows there, he sees something scurry down the steps next to him - fast!  It only takes a moment and then he's hot up the stairs again.  He had been on his way to the latrine, but ended up holding it for the remaining four hours of his duty.  The other guy guarding with him is a transfer into the Air Force from the Marines and when my son told him that he just saw a camel spider, the guy freaked out!  LOL  As it is, the towers are infested with black widows and brown recluse.  Guess those little buggers aren't indiginous to the states.  *shudders*

Great writing, though, desptie the heebie jeebies it gave me.  Loved how you had Raph pinned to the refrig, too.  Again, very funny stuff there.  

Be blessed,
Rene'
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« Reply #9 on: October 27, 2006, 12:27:48 AM »

*hijacking thread for a moment*
Hey Rene,

Kewl to hear how your son is doing, I'm always thinking of you guys. Happy/Smile
Heard they also call those camel spiders "sun scorpions". In the spider family, or something like that...

*end of thread hijacking*

Wild spiders, huuuge spi-- Shocked

Maybe I'll go watch something not so intimidating before bedtime, like-- oh, Dawn of the Dead, or something...  Cool

Har har.
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« Reply #10 on: October 27, 2006, 08:03:38 AM »

Hmm...must think of a suitable response....  Wink

Hmm.............



Good story, Leo, worth the wait!  Hopefully that coalition stays away ... but why did the ketchup chip have to suffer??

*Makes mental note to not go near the fridge if there are any spiders nearby*

 LOL
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« Reply #11 on: October 27, 2006, 10:27:29 AM »

Hee.. so funny.  Especially the way Don keeps saying "Spiders are good!"   Happy/Smile (Anime Style)

A nit-pick... Febreeze is actually in a spray bottle (unless RaphEmer was using was those new fancy-smancy aersol type in a can).

*then her inner Don has to correct Raph for the fun of it*  "Spiders aren't bugs, or insects.  They belong to the arachnid family."  *smirk*
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Leonardo
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« Reply #12 on: October 27, 2006, 10:57:15 AM »

aah, so Don has corrections. LOL
I'll leave the bug thing up to Raph. *smirk*
So...Raph, what exactly were you really using up there in Canada land to spritz those spiders with for RL??
I can make that fix, need be! I don't use Febreeze at all, so....  Razz

Glad everyone's enjoying it so far, as I said in Thread Killer, I had fun lifting comments from Raph and the Tellos (for the Pro Spider Platform) to incorporate. It's my thinking Don probably studied the spiders before releasing them and had some kind of conversation with them, too.  Cool
And yes, Raph, the chips were made to suffer, I am sorry but it made for a better story that way.  Love
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« Reply #13 on: October 27, 2006, 11:59:25 AM »

liked reading this a lot!! poor raph, stuck on the fridge, and then sprayed... well at least they are out of the lair forgood...or are they.... >Happy/Smile  

nice story!!! worth the wait too!!!  Thumbs Up  Thumbs Up
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« Reply #14 on: October 27, 2006, 12:18:16 PM »

Here's what I used as my 'spider repellent':

http://www.price-club.co.jp/cgi-bin/tkxdoc/goods_img/Febreze%20Air%20Effects%20Citrus%20&%20Light%20L.jpg

And I suspect Raph is using a generic 'bugs' to mean anything in the insect/arachnid family. Wink
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« Reply #15 on: October 27, 2006, 09:23:03 PM »

hmmm, thanks for the pic, Raph!
Now...do I need to rewrite my thing or not??
 Think

I agree, for Raph, bug is a technical term defined as "anything with an exoskeleton and 6 or more legs that creeps or crawls around, especially surprise apperances from under places, and is something Not Liked by Raph."
How's that?
 LOL  LOL  LOL
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« Reply #16 on: October 27, 2006, 09:30:28 PM »

Very good definition, especially that last part.  Very Happy/Big Grin

I don't think any rewrites are in order, though. Your description of the usage of Febreeze is fine.
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« Reply #17 on: October 27, 2006, 09:35:21 PM »

aaah, I wrote something Raph liked!
It is a good day.
 Very Happy/Big Grin

As for not having to rewrite, whew!! Thank you for your techinical advice. So not only have you been an inspiration to me, you've given me advice....
 Shocked
This now makes it an interesting day, too....
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« Reply #18 on: October 28, 2006, 04:44:06 PM »

LOL!!  Good to read some of your work again, Nardo.  I hope things work out so you'll have more time in the future to write.
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« Reply #19 on: October 29, 2006, 11:17:17 AM »

*humble grin*  The only febreeze I used was of the spray bottle variety, but as I made the post, I realized they had that other stuff out now too.  But why do I find this section of the Febreze website to be amusing?

*then falls back into true Don/CSI!Grissom form*  Ah... but entemology is a fascinating area of study!  What one can learn from "bugs" can also help in solving certain crime mysteries too.
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« Reply #20 on: October 29, 2006, 11:29:31 AM »

*having gone to the website, having heard the voice clips*
uh...I can't help but think of them using it on bugs and spiders and stuff!!
I think we need Raph in there on a confession!
 LOL  LOL  LOL  LOL  LOL
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« Reply #21 on: January 17, 2012, 07:48:10 PM »

Oh, man, that was hilarious. I can see Raph trying to use Febreze as a bug repellent. Now, whenever I see a Febreze commercial, I'll add in my head, "Not only does it keep things fresh, it can repel spiders, too." Good job on this.
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« Reply #22 on: January 18, 2012, 07:27:35 PM »

Surprisingly enough, I can see Raph using the Febreeze (especially the Citrus scent - *glances at the can of bug spray air freshener a few feet away*) as bug spray oh-so-easily.  Twisted Evil
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