I hate being Invisible

[cynlee]

I truly do.  I hate being ignored sometimes.  I don't expect a lot of notice, but there ARE times when I truly think that I've said/done/etc something that any normal person would naturally EXPECT some sort of response, only to be ignored as if I've said/written/etc nothing at all.

In fact, I very nearly posted a biographical timeline of all the memorable instances in my life when I've been ignored, or treated as invisible-- to this day I am convinced that "Invisible Boy" from the movie "Mystery Men" was based on my life, except I am not a young black male-- but then I thought it would be simply overkill.

So I shall restate the title-- I hate being invisible.

[Michaelangelo]

  I'm really sorry you feel this way Cynlee... I really like you and I don't try to ignore you at all.  I always enjoy chatting with you, and if I've done anything for you to feel that way I am really sorry.

[moronqueen]

Yeah...know the feeling. When you nearly get sat on while riding the bus no less than three times in one ride...

Seriously, though sometimes people just don't know how to respond, or they just don't have the chance. Or the brain farts are too explosive for them to catch the post or...well, a whole number of things, I guess. As frustrating as it is, it really is something that happens to everyone at one time or another, and usually isn't intentional at all..

[Shredder]

I truly do.  I hate being ignored sometimes.  I don't expect a lot of notice, but there ARE times when I truly think that I've said/done/etc something that any normal person would naturally EXPECT some sort of response, only to be ignored as if I've said/written/etc nothing at all.

In fact, I very nearly posted a biographical timeline of all the memorable instances in my life when I've been ignored, or treated as invisible-- to this day I am convinced that "Invisible Boy" from the movie "Mystery Men" was based on my life, except I am not a young black male-- but then I thought it would be simply overkill.

So I shall restate the title-- I hate being invisible.

I don't feel like I get ignored, so much as avoided.   There must be something about my look, how I Act, etc that causes people too ignore/avoid me at all costs. Especially when I try too start some kind of conversation for practice.  I normally get in one sentence, and that's it.  And forget about trying too talk too women, ugh.  Last time I tried too chat up a lady at the NYCC I didn't even get a response or a look..

So, you are not the only one who tends too get ignored in public.

[cynlee]

Yeah-- I get that too.

But I think there is a fine line between being ignored and being avoided.

And I'm pretty sure that, the majority of the time, I'm being ignored.

I make the effort to NOT be offended-- Lord knows I have no right to expect everyone to hang upon my every word or every post or every anything-- but it burns when I feel that I've made a statement that is not something that could be classified as "general in passing", only to be dismissed out of hand without so much as a "yeah right moving on" comment.

Usually I say nothing-- but sometimes I feel the need to say something.


Don't know why-- in the end, it only results in a brief "Oh!  Hi, didn't see you there!" type of thing, followed by once again fading into the background of Life.

[Lady Mew2]

*hugs Cyn*

[cynlee]

MEW!!!  Where have you been?  I've not seen you at Mikey's forEVER!!!

*hugs Mew*

[Amicitia]

I feel you. My own parents misplace me all the time. When I'm standing right next to them. I know I walk quietly, but really.

[CriticalCrittles]

Honestly, I think EVERYONE feels ignored at one time or another. I mean, I know it happens to me pretty often, even by my own friends too, which is kinda sad. Though, no one here of course    The depressing feeling I often get, is that I'm annoying people, either with what my conversation topic often likes to be (Michael Sinterniklaas/Venture Bros) or when I need to ask people to help me with things or do favors for me...people tend to insist that I'm not bothering them or they don't mind, but something just makes me feel like they're just saying that to make me feel better....le sigh....suppose it's just one of those things that will always be there and I'll just have to learn to deal with it.

[cynlee]

....Though, no one here of course   ...

Of course.

[Ninjara]

"I hate being invisible."
   I can recall saying the exact same thing.  Only I said it before I hit my fifties.  I got a belly-full sometime ago in my late thirties.
   I just made up my mind that no matter how self-absorbed the people around me were, this was my time to be on stage, and to hell with anyone that had a problem with it.
   Pull yourself up by your bootstraps, Cynlee my dear, because you ARE entitled to your share of the spotlight.  
   
    It's attitude.  It's demeanor.  It's how you carry yourself and how you speak.  Your voice has to be loud enough to be heard, but not necessarily strident or shrill.

    Geez.  Where the heck did I get this?  I dunno.  Martial arts?  Some of it maybe.  That walk like a warrior thing.  The rest of it just came because I realized no one was gonna give it to me.  It's something you seize in life and give yourself permission to do.

    It sounds to me like you've gotten your belly full.  Take the stage.  You deserve your moments.

[BubblyShell22]

Cyn, I know how you feel. I feel that way too at times. I felt that way last summer while taking my Statistics class and then failing it for the second time. I did everything I could do to pass it, but I felt like the professor was ignoring me. It was like she didn't think I was good enough or something. I'm supposed to get my first test back today (yes, I'm taking it for a third time.) and if I fail, I'll just feel worthless or something. I mean, I got a tutor this semester, and I've done very well with him, but if I fail this test, I'll feel that all my effort is for nothing. It's even worse because I need this class to graduate and this is my final semester. I feel your pain, Cynlee. If you need to talk to me, I'll be there for you. You can count on me. And I'll always look forward to your wonderful stories that brighten my day every time I read them. Best of luck to you!

*gives Cyn a hug and a Splinter plushie*

[Aignatius]

I hear you on the invisible-ness at times, but there are also times when I don't really mind being invisible.
Too much attention gets to be overwhelming.
As far as feeling worthless, yes, often, and for most of my life. But that has developed into a feeling of defiance, as well.
See, if people don't acknowledge my existence after some attempts, then their attention is not worth seeking further. The world's a big place, there's always going to be someone out there who will value you just as you are, it's just a matter of finding the right kind.
Enough said.  

[Mindy]

I hear you on this subject, Cynlee! Whether it's in real life or online, I constantly get ignored. Can anyone provide some scientific or psychological info on this matter? It happens to a lot of folks.

It's really disheartening when I'm ignored online. On various forums, I certainly am a 'thread killer' or none of my questions get answered or comments. A slow forum, I could understand, but a high traffic one.. hrrm.

Anyways, I guess I've learned to deal with it the best I can, which usually means not talking as much anymore. That's the kind of person I am, though.

[Lady Mew2]

MEW!!!  Where have you been?  I've not seen you at Mikey's forEVER!!!

*hugs Mew*

lol. I been busy with my board and Mikeys forum locked my account. Mew!